Words of Affirmation never meant shit to me...
Updated: Mar 28, 2022
When it comes to men and dating yall already know I've had some rotten tore up apples as of lately lmao!! But this doesn't stop me AT ALL from venturing out in the dating world and attempting to locate my equal. Shit I know I'm not perfect but goddamn, let a bitch know if she ain't getting something right!! Back in my teen years 19 to be exact, I got into the "Love Language" craze that had everyone convinced a mf didn't know how to love they toxic asses. And now in my late 20's...I find myself returning to that conversation of what a "Love Language" really is.
Every person understands and receives love in a specific language, 5 ways to be exact with one being the most fluent. - Dr. Chapman.
So you mean to tell me, there are 5 ways a person should be loved?! No wonder a mf stay lonely, that's just to many attributes to maintain!! Honestly, I feel everyone only has one language they really gravitate too, the rest are just qualities you would want in a partner anyway. Nonetheless, I still feel pinpointing your "Love Language" can save you from the unnecessary "You got played" ending.
So here we have....
Words of Affirmation, 2 Quality Time, 3 Receiving Gifts, 4 Acts of Service and 5 Quality Time.
Now, I'm not knocking Mr Chapman when he created this masterpiece of love direction, but honestly some of these raise a thick ass eyebrow when it comes to loving someone for who they are..but I won't do that...today lmao! Out of the 5 languages "Acts of Service" is my love language in every aspect.
Acts of Service is my love language a 100%, there's something about a man doing something without me asking him that does something to me..
Acts of service are a BIG thing for me, this just shows how hard a person fucks with you. It's one thing to "say" your going to be there, but to actually do it with no question asked?!! BABYYYYY
I've always been stubborn when it comes to expressing my feelings for a man. Unfortunately, I'm the woman with a brick wall, barb wire and attack dogs right outside of my heart. The trust issue factor with me is UNREAL, I've had some dirty dogs in my day man don't judge me!!! I've never been big on "words of affirmation"..because do words really hold value anymore? How many times has a nigga said " I love you, your the only one" just for you to end up at the clinic with the booboo face. No..just me? -___-.. lmao!! Men , well toxic people in general have a good way of using their words to finesse. But actions will always speak louder than words, let me say that again "ACTIONS ALWAYS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!!". I need a man to not only say he got me, but to actually have my back!! I want a man who will pick up the slack, who will carry you when your tired, Hell just rub a bitch feet when she asks shit!!
A real "mans man", the "dont worry about it I got it.." or the "I took care of that already.." Oooweee that just makes the pussy cry tears of joy!! Next up for me would be physical touch, because Im a whole nympho out here. Like sex is just a very real connection for me, and if the sex ain't right then we can't get right. Sorry NOT sorry, I enjoy a good fuck but intimacy within sex is a another level of love that I just don't think alot of men are prepared for. Like no cap, this pussy I own has created mental strains on men, this pussy I won has created stalkers and potential serial killers !! It's not just about having good pussy, its about making a man feel like he is the only one to make this pussy feel this way. OOO look at me dropping some knowledge.
Quality time would be 3rd for me, I enjoy being alone with my BAE. Getting to know each other, finding out what they dislike and also why they keep hearting ugly bitches pics on IG lmao, was that too far?!! Spending quality time can strengthen a friendship amongst a relationship. It's overly important to bond with your mate on a spiritual, emotional and friendship level. S/o to my ex in college J.Forest !! Out of all the bad, the good we had was our true friendship, like we legit would hang out together as friends too. An attribute I dearly miss when it comes to dating, niggas don't know how to just vibe anymore.
Words of affirmation don't even make the list for me, because again, words don't mean shit!! But I'll take the occasional " you look good bae" or "I'm proud of you" statement. Yes babby tell me how lit I am so I can ignite your fire lmao!! Receiving gifts just screams gold digger to me, but I digress. Overtime I can say my "Love Language" has evolved tremendously. Back in my early 20's I yearned for "I love you's" and "I support you's" just to realize a mf gone do what they wanna do. But as I approach these dirty thirties, I want nothing more than security and quality time.
Does our Love Language Change with time?
Mos def, we grow and evolve with age so it's only right that they way we love evolves too. Time is the true healer and revealer, it will show you who you were AND who you were meant to be. As we grow we have to re-evaluate what type of love we are capable of accepting. We have to decide the type of "love language" we are willing to understand or conform too. Does a love language accurately describe you as a person? I would say so, once you've mastered how to be loved, you can give the type of love you've been needing..
What's your "LOVE LANGUAGE BABYY?"